The kiddos & I left last Thursday morning headed for Panama City Beach, FL for a little vacation/family time.

We arrived & checked in about 5:30, unloaded & went to our room. Then it was off to WalMart to get some drinks, sammich & breakfast stuff to take back to the room. We went out to the beach that evening & walked a bit, which was really nice. B & T actually went IN the water (against my wishes) for a quick swim. I warned them that you're NOT supposed to go in the ocean after dark.

Friday morning, we headed straight out to the sand, sea & sun. The water was very calm & clear. You could see your legs & feet - & knew what was around you (thank God). That was nice for Lulu too as she was able to enjoy it. T kept taking her out, but I made her come back in as it's too dangerous for Lulu to be over her head "just in case".... They had so much fun & the water was the perfect temp too. Then it was back up to the pool for some fresh water fun. We stayed there for about an hour before going in to clean up. We drove up the strip & went in & out of shops looking around. The kids all had their own money to spend. Lulu bought her an airbrush shirt with her name on it. She was so proud paying for this herself! After shopping, we stopped for dinner at "Pineapple Willies". T wanted to go there. She bought her a shirt in their store. The food was good. B got ribs that fell off the bone. mmmmmm We left there & went back to our hote. We walked on the beach & the kids were trying to catch sand crabs.

Saturday it was more or less the same as Friday. More sand, sea & sun. I had an umbrella over me but still managed to get my back fried! I guess is was the sun reflecting off of the white sand. Ouch! It still hurts today too! Lulu has the small of her back burned too, but not as bad as mine. I had good sunscreen too, but I guess it wasn't enough.

Sunday was a long day driving back. The kids watched movies while I drove. We did stop for lunch in Montgomery at Hooters. B had his pic made with a couple of the Hooters' girls. He was blushing too when our waitress would bring other girls to our table. It was fun.

So, vacation is over & today it was back to work. No, I didn't want to get up this morning, nor did I want to be back here. Gotta pay those bills tho.

Hope you all have a great week!

IDIOT SIGHTING: We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than two." We haven't used Sears repair since.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore." From Kingman, KS.

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IDIOTS IN FOOD SERVICE: My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
He was a Chef? Yep... From Kansas City!

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IDIOT SIGHTING: I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

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IDIOT SIGHTING: The stoplight on the corner buzzes when its safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.
Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!" She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker.
She was leaving the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun. We should do this more often."
Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare. This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on. A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.
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IDIOT SIGHTING: When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!" His reply, "I know. I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, Mississippi!

I got home from work yesterday about 4:20, locked my car, & went in the house. I set my coffee cup, water & my purse on the kitchen table, then went to the bathroom to let my mother's dog out. When I opened the bathroom door, the dog had messed & paced around in it. Yes, there was dried/smeared poop all over my bathroom floor. ( More on this subject & the reason I have the dog is Randy's LifeAfterTheHollow blog on the "Dog $h!t" post )

So, I jumped over this mess & immediately put the dog in the bath tub for a quick bath. I had to before I let him on the carpet as it was caked all over his feet. I jumped back over the mess to the hall & brought the dog with me. I get to my kitchen & see that my purse is no longer on the kitchen table. I KNOW I put it there.... Time lapse: approx 15-20 minutes tops. I usually lock the door behind me as soon as I get in. This time I didn't because I was going straight to let the dog out to do his business.

I looked in the car to see if it was in there, but I knew it wasn't as I never do that. I walked all through the house to see if I absentmindedly laid it down somewhere else. I knew I hadn't. I looked at the carport door & it was only pulled to - not shut....

Evidently, someone came in my house RIGHT BEHIND ME . Now THAT'S scary! He KNEW I WAS IN THE HOUSE!! How did he know I wasn't standing right there? Did he care? No! That takes some big cojones!! I wonder if he was armed &/or on drugs. My back was to the hall so he could've easily gotten me. Thank God the kids weren't home; otherwise, Lulu would've been playing in the living room or kitchen area. The older two are at their dad's so it would've been just me & my Lulu. Thank you Lord!!

I did everything I'm supposed to do. I called my sis to hurry over with her cell phone. I got on the house phone with the bank to cancel my debit cards & Visa. My accounts are now frozen & cannot be used. I called AT&T/Cingular to deactivate my sim car on my cell, Kay's to cancel that account, along with Wakefield's/Martin's. Think...think...what to do...who to call....

My purse has my LIFE in it! EVERYTHING is in there!! They have my house keys, outbuilding keys, keys to both cars (yes, I'm stuck!), checkbooks, Drivers License w/SSN, cell phone, health insurance cards for all 4 of us, the kids ID cards they have done at school each year with pic & all of their info on them. I had hardly any cash in there so they didn't hit "the motherload", but I did have T's Walmart gift card for $20. I was to use it & give her the cash. We're supposed to be going to the beach Thursday morning & she wanted to take that with her. Now I don't have it....

My Pacifica has the key with the remote (data chip inside). You have to have the key code to get another very expensive key made. That's in my glove box in the locked car. Doesn't matter anyway cuz they have the keys. I've got to have someone come out to the house to re-key the car. $$$

I did find a spare to my mini van, but it has no gas.... I got Randy's debit card for that & I've got to go get 3 new door knobs/dead bolt locks for the doors first thing today.

I know anyone driving my last night thought Randy came home drunk as a skunk. I had him park his car sideways behind both of my vehicles so no one could drive off in them overnight. I know it looked odd.

My credit card company gave me a number to call from "Privacy Assist". They monitor your credit & notify you if someone tries to open up any credit under your info. They have ALL of my info. Now I've got to pay for that service for awhile...until I can make sure my identity is safe again. I do NOT want that stolen too.

Anyway, prayers are desperately needed. I've been violated...I don't have the funds to do what is needed...I'm scared...Someone has all of mine & my children's personal info....

Well, I'm off to get started. I'm not sure where to begin.

1. Okay, okay! I take it back. Unf -- k you
2. You say I'm a b!tch like it's a bad thing.
3. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.
4. Well, aren't we a damn ray of sunshine?
5. Don't bother me; I'm living happily ever after.
6. Do I look like a people person?
7. This isn't an office. It's hell with fluorescent lighting.
8. I started out with nothing and I still have most of it left.
9. Therapy is expensive. Popping bubble wrap is cheap. You choose.
10. Why don't you try practicing random acts of intelligence and senseless acts of self-control?
11. I'm not crazy. I've been in a very bad mood for 30 years.
12. Sarcasm is just one more service I offer.
13. Do they ever shut up on your planet?
14. I'm not your type: I'm not inflatable.
15. Stress is when you wake up screaming and you realize you haven't gone to sleep yet!
16. Back off!! You're standing in my aura.
17. Don't worry. I forgot your name too.
18. I work 45 hours a week to be this poor.
19. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.
20. Wait. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.
21. Chaos, panic and disorder ... my work here is done.
22. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.
23. You look like $h!t. Is that the style now?
24. Earth is full. Go home.
25. Aw, did I step on your poor little itty bitty ego?
26. I'm not tense, just terribly, terribly alert.
27. A hard-on doesn't count as personal growth.
28. You are depriving some village of an idiot.
29. If a$$holes could fly, this place would be an airport.
30. Look deeply into my eyes ... Do you see one ounce of give-a-$h!t?

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions.

"How old are you?" " I'm four and a half!" You're never thirty-six and a half. You're four and a half, going on five! That's the key

You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number, or even a few ahead.

"How old are you?" "I'm gonna be 16!" You could be 13, but hey, you're gonna be 16! And then the greatest day of your life . you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony . YOU BECOME 21. YESSSS!!!

But then you turn 30. Oooohh, what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk! He TURNED; we had to throw him out. There's no fun now, you're Just a sour-dumpling. What's wrong? What's changed?

You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40. Whoa! Put on the brakes, it's all slipping away. Before you know it, you REACH 50 and your dreams are gone.

But wait!!! You MAKE it to 60. You didn't think you would!

So you BECOME 21, TURN 30, PUSH 40, REACH 50 and MAKE it to 60.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

You get into your 80's and every day is a complete cycle; you HIT lunch; you TURN 4:30; you REACH bedtime. And it doesn't end there. Into the 90s, you start going backwards; "I Was JUST 92."

Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again. "I'm 100 and a half!" May you all make it to a healthy 100 and a half!!